But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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