i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
