JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize