Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
They have beer where we have blood.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
