I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize