i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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