I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
