$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
