FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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