Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
