ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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