She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
