I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Send help, water and tortillas.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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