yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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