Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
