Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
