it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Randomize
