She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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