No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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