You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
