it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
