hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Randomize
