She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
