She just used a chaser for red wine.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
