I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
