Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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