Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
