in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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