I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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