just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
