i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Randomize
