Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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