Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
