wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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