I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
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