Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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