She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Michael Bay diarrhea
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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