Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
