I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
