Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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