wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Randomize