I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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