i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
