idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
vagina is talking i cant
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
