You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
