how can u be prego again
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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