Whatcha textin bout Willis?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
