I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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