He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize