Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
